Alright 10 minute brain drain…bring it…
It’s been a long week so far, and it’s only freaking Tuesday (well, only a few hours away from Wednesday). My mom, who is like my best friend, went into back surgery Monday morning. Thankfully all went well and she is resting peacefully at home now. Yes, that is quick to come home from the hospital after back surgery, but she is stubborn and determined. Let’s just say she is 4’11” and from experience, you don’t mess with the short people. They can be scary. Her bark is MUCH bigger than she is. She’s a tough lady and when she has her mind set on something, that’s it, it’s done. No questions, you just do it. Living only a mere few blocks from her home (my childhood home) I was able to help my dad bring her into the house and visit and take care of her for a while before the hubs got home from work.
Hubs and I are having a difficult time right now financially due to me being off work and now off unemployment because the government has decided to stop federal extensions (that’s a whole other rant I can go off on, but now isn’t the time) and since this is the first time I have EVER been on unemployment, it is very discouraging. In fact, I have developed an ulcer from all of this crap. Seriously, an ulcer. I am only 34 years old! In the back of my mind, I secretly imagine my old work place spontaneous com-busting. (I could think of much worse, especially after being a loyal employee for 9 1/2 years). Grrr….there I go again. All that built up resent and anger. I know it’s not good to hold on to grudges, but man is it hard to get that bitter taste out of your mouth.
Where was I going with all of this….hmmm…oh yeah…what I was trying to go on about is that things may be a little different if I just uprooted out of California. I have lived in the Bay Area my entire life, actually the same town all my life. Traveling to a few places on the west coast, I feel I might fit in nicely in Washington or even some parts of Oregon. (Ashland is absolutely gorgeous.) Don’t get me wrong, California is a great place to live. We get every season, which I can’t say for some other states. We have beaches, mountains, lakes, skiing, redwoods, you name it. But it is so dang expensive to live here. The average cost of a home out here is roughly around $500k. After watching Property Brothers and House Hunters (maybe a little too much) it seems like I could just sell this home, buy a home with that money ANYWHERE else, with no mortgage and the home would be a lot bigger than what we have now. I do love my current home. It was my Nanie’s house and it has so many fond memories in it. Sometimes, however, those memories can get a little overwhelming to me. The constant reminder of someone you loved and cared for so much can be difficult, especially on some rough days.
My husband keeps bringing up, “Why don’t we just move?” Yeah, sure, with our current situation, why DON’T we just move. I have one very simple answer to that…My Mom! I love this woman so much. Like I said, she is like my best friend. We go run errands together every weekend and she is so supportive of me. Also, if I wasn’t here, no one else would really care for her. My brother lives in Discovery Bay and we rarely see him or his little family. If I just left, the guilt would eat at me immensely. I can’t just leave this woman. She took care of me for so long, it’s my turn to repay the favor and make sure she is being taken care of.
So, I guess moving can wait for now. Not saying it will never happen, just hopefully not for a while.