I’m a little late, but YAY…it’s that time again!
‘KETCHUP WITH US’ – PROMPT #18
So, last night I was taking a shower and I noticed a huge (well huge to me) Daddy Long Legs perched in the corner of the ceiling of the shower. Now let me make this perfectly clear. I HATE SPIDERS! They creep me out! Their many beady eyes glaring out you, plotting their move to attack. (Ok, ok. Maybe I’m being a little dramatic, but you understand, right) Probably because my mom use to chase my brother and I around the house with them, but that’s an entirely different within itself. So anywho, here is the said spider…
Ginormous, RIGHT?!? Of course the damn thing would have to be positioned behind me. (See, perfect attacking position). So as I lathered up, standing as far back in the shower as humanly possible without going through the wall and keeping my eyes fixed upon the beast, it decides to slowly make it’s descend to the bottom of the shower. Now this wouldn’t have been so bad if the strong shower head we have didn’t create a tornado type wind in the shower. This wind caused this spider to literally fly around in circles (I swear I am not making this up) inching it’s way closer and closer to me. Oh hell no! Since I was already backed up against the shower wall, I had no choice but to jump out (soapy and all). Only when I jumped out of the shower (and yes I did literally JUMP out) I failed to notice that my daughter’s stepping stool for the toilet was right there. So as I jump out, my foot hits the stepping stool and not being prepared for this, I go flying towards the sink. Luckily I didn’t do any damage to myself or the bathroom. By the time all of this was over, the spider calmly made it’s way back to it’s little spot in the corner. (See, full blown attack!)
This morning, the damn thing was on the ceiling right above the toilet. Not cool! I go tell my husband to get rid of it and my kid speaks up saying “No! Leave it there!” Seriously?!? Why?!? Later that morning (since I am working from home today) I notice that it has literally disappeared. I searched the entire bathroom and I cannot find it. You have no idea how much this freaks me out! Now I go into the bathroom each time like I am in a horror movie…
Yesterday my mom bought Em a new toy, just because. This toy is annoyingly loud and of course my 3 year old loves it!
The person who’s house it will be staying at (mark my words)
This toy will mysteriously disappear before our 6+ hour car ride tomorrow.
First of all, let me start off by saying I am so blessed to have such a smart, amazing, beautiful daughter. I thank God for her every night. I am so lucky and blessed to be a mama.
Ok, so after I woke up at the butt crack of dawn to go to the grocery store to get what I needed for Mother’s Day brunch with my in-laws (I spent Saturday with my mama) I came home to a clean house, courtesy of my husband. (this itself was a big enough present for me) Then my daughter went and got the presents she made for me and the present her and daddy picked out.
Little one made me a stepping stone, with the help of my mom, to go in my garden (last year she made me one that was the shape of a frog). She also made me a bracelet that said “I Love You Mom”. My mom told her she had to hide it so she hid the bracelet under her dresser in her room. I had no idea. I got a Hallmark hand-print card that she wrote her own name in and wrote MOM. (She’s only 3 1/2) Also, my mom and Em picked out a shirt that said “World’s Best Mom”. Not really sure I hold that title, but I’ll take it. Then Em and daddy picked out a Memory Book at Hallmark. I get to put pictures in it with her and record our voices with the pictures. (This will hold very special memories for me and I can’t wait to get started)
So we ate and talked. Em was in love with the fact that her Uncle’s girlfriend was there. She just adores her, and the feeling seems to be mutual. Now came the second round of gifts. My mother-in-law opened her gift first, and then it was my turn. When I began to unwrap my gift (with the help of Em of course) all I could see was neon green. I’m thinking to myself, what did she get me that is neon green. When it was all unwrapped, this is what I got:
Matching family, neon green shirts for our trip to Disneyland later this week. I couldn’t help but laugh, neither could everyone else. She put a lot of work into these shirts, so naturally we have to wear them a take a picture for her. My husband is so not thrilled with this, which makes it all the more funnier. Yep, we are going to be THAT family. I told my husband that at least we won’t lose each other in a crowd. (He still didn’t find this amusing). My brother-in-laws girlfriend was laughing, saying that if we were going to wear these we had to go all out, Mickey gloves, mouse ears, the works. Hell yeah! I’ll have to see what I can get my hubs to do. I’m down to look like a fool. I will be sure to post pics on my return home. I figure this can’t be any worse than what my mom had our family wear when I was 6 or 7 years old (Girls had pink, boys had blue, both had a pig’s face on the front and pig’s butt on the back). Neon green, I can handle. I have been prepared.
So, I hope all of your Mother’s Days were as wonderful and amusing as mine.
On May 25th, I will have been at my job for 9 years. That is a looooong time and over my years of doing Medical Review for a legal copy service I have stumbled upon some “creative”, to say the least, ways of hurting oneself on the job. I have also seen graphic pictures of injuries that NO ONE should see unless you are a doctor or nurse or in some kind of medical profession. Although, I do have to say that it has helped my stomach to become a little bit stronger.
Other things I have learned is to never work with animals (mainly cows or bulls) and if you are to work with them, DO NOT hunch, bend, kneel, sit, crouch close to them. DO NOT try to open a gate while a herd of cattle is coming towards you (just jump over that shit) and while milking an animal DO NOT kneel or sit close to the butt (that should really go without saying, but it happens more often than you think).
Also, beware of the work toilet. Yep, that’s right. I said it and you heard (read) me correctly. Them SOB’s are more dangerous than you think (or there are just some really stupid and unfortunate individuals out there where toilets are the enemy). I will never forget reading about this woman who went to go use the public bathroom at work. She was supposedly “missing” per her co-workers for a few hours. When someone went in to check on her, what they found was truly embarrassing. The woman was laying at the bottom of the stall (eww doesn’t even begin to describe it). The toilet had collapsed while the woman was on it. It shattered and she ended up having several shards of porcelain souvenirs shoved in her buttocks. I couldn’t make this up ladies and gentlemen if I tried.
So don’t say I didn’t worn you and good luck at your place of employment.